Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Today, I took the day off of work and took Claudia to the mall. They were having a special even where you could meet Dora and have a Christmas dance and sing a long. Claudia loves all things Dora so it was a special me and her time.

While standing in line, there was a grandma in front of us with her 4 grandkids (I am assuming. A few called her grandma and they all looked similar in age). 2 of the little girls were talking to my cousin and her daughter. Somehow the fact came up that my cousin's daughter has 3 older sisters. The little boy of the group, who is maybe 4, then turns to me and says " I have three sisters too." And a few seconds later, he says, "I have a brother who died."

I sat for a second, not sure of what he said.

I asked him what he said and he repeated "I have a brother who died. His name is Nathan."

I was holding Claudia and I said to him "She has a brother who died. His name is Curtis. That is hard when a brother dies."

He nodded and smiled at me.

I said to him "Thank you for telling me about him."

He beamed and went back to playing with his cousins. I saw his grandma give a sweet smile to him.

I have always wondered. I have always wondered what Claudia and Cole will say. Will they mention him with ease like this little boy? I sure hope so. Will it change as they get older? What relationship can or will they have with a baby who left way before they were ever present?

But, I am so thankful I ran into that little boy and his sweet mention of his brother, Nathan. And to Nathan and this little boy's parents: Thank you. Thank you for talking about the son you lost and making sure he is int he hearts of your other children.

5 comments:

Hope's Mama said...

Oh. How sweet. I've come over a bit weepy. I haven't thought about this too much - how my kids will talk about the sibling they never met when I'm not around. I still haven't got it clear in my head how I'm going to tell Angus (and possible future children) at all. Of course I will, and I hope they speak about Hope just as this little boy did, but it seems like such a huge thing to introduce to a toddler. I want to try and get this right as I already feel like I've screwed him up enough :(

loribeth said...

That is so sweet. I love how honest & open children can be. But it obviously starts with the parents being willing to talk about his brother with him.

Ya Chun said...

I luv Loribeth's comment.

That was sweet. I wonder how old his brother was or if it was a stillbirth.

And I think kids need opportunities to express there feelings about this too. It's hard to know what they are thinking or feeling if they never get a chnce to express themselves.

Mirne said...

That made me cry. Really. That what I had hoped Kees would say, about his sister. Then I hoped it was what Jet would say, about his brother and sister. But they never got to say it. I hope your children will remember and talk about their sibling.

Angela Donaldson said...

This brought tears to my eyes that is incredibly sweet. I always wonder what people think when my boys talk about Ethan