From this....

To This....

To so much better!!

Thank you for all your kind thoughts and prayers. Cole is back home after 7 days in the hospital. We are blessed to have been at a great hospital whose sole purpose is helping children get better. We were one of MANY families dealing with RSV on our floor!

It is so great to see our Cole smiling and happy again. When Claudia came home from daycare to see her baby brother home she squealed and laughed. She really didn't notice he was gone. She is still pretty much in the 'live in the moment' kind of thing. When I asked her where Cole was the one day I got to see her during this she told me he was at "work". But it was nice to see her so happy when she got to see him again. What is funny is one of the kids, Kay, at daycare missed him the most. Each morning after Claudia was brought in, Kay would look around and ask where "baby Cole" was. Today when I picked up Claudia, she pitched a little fit over not getting to see baby Cole. We had to assure her he would be there tomorrow.

I was grateful walking out of that hospital with our son. Like I mentioned in my last post, I struggled (and am struggling) with the knowledge that I missed my baby being in so much distress. Again. I was lucky this time. Lucky I was on the winning end this time.

I know I haven't been here in eons.

I have been...struggling. I miss Curtis. I love Claudia and Cole. I am trying to navigate my way through our days and nights. We have had a roller coaster 4 months with me having surgery, the holidays, me going back to work part time, and sick kids.

I have so much to share...but right now I am here to ask for thoughts, prayers, good vibes...whatever you can send.

Our dear Cole is currently in the hospital. He was admitted Tuesday night with a serious case of RSV. I took him to urgent care Tuesday night, honestly thinking we would get a nebulizer treatment and go home. Within 10 minutes, they had called an ambulance and we were on our way. It was such a flurry of activity I sat back and watched, paralyzed in fear. What just happened? He was just congested, right? We had no idea how bad he was...he is our little champ and had been in a good mood, acting fine...this whole time he was struggling to breathe and we didn't know it.

Just like Curtis. He was struggling to get oxygen and I didn't even know it.

We do believe Cole is on the mend. He is getting the best help and is in the best place for children who need to be hospitalized. But it has been a long road as his little body fights this. He is slow to recover from this, but he is getting there.

Thank you for anything you can send our way.